


toward brighter days

by teeandrainbows



Series: Troped! [22]
Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: (kinda), Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Background Character Death, Elf!Raven, Epistolary, F/F, Gay Panic, Holidays, Minor Memori, Pining, Pixie!Memori, Road Trips, Romance, Sharing a Bed, Yuletide, Yuletide Traditions, mermaid!Luna
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-24
Updated: 2020-12-24
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:15:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,067
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28280754
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/teeandrainbows/pseuds/teeandrainbows
Summary: Dear Harper,I am ridiculously out of it this morning.  Last night, when we reached the campsite, Luna suggested we give Echo her own bedroll, since she gave hers up the night before.Which meant Luna was sleeping with me.Beside me.Excerpts from Raven's journal as she travels to Polis for the Winter Solstice Festival
Relationships: Echo & Raven Reyes, Harper McIntyre & Raven Reyes, Luna/Raven Reyes
Series: Troped! [22]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1547764
Comments: 1
Kudos: 7
Collections: TROPED: Holiday Trope Exchange 2.0





	toward brighter days

**Author's Note:**

> Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays!
> 
> This is my gift for ~~a mystery recipient~~ ashpalana in the Chopped Holiday Double Blind Fic Exchange! They requested a Raven wlw rarepair combined with apocalyptic log (aka an epistolary), bed sharing, a road trip, and mythical creatures!
> 
> Enjoy!

Dear Harper,

The Winter Solstice is nearly upon us. Echo and I are setting out tomorrow, and it will take us close to two weeks to travel to Polis for the Festival. We’ll be following the river there, and Echo thinks we may meet Murphy and Emori along the way. Wouldn’t that be nice?

I wish you were still here. This was a journey we used to make together, do you remember? Every year, we would pack our bags and travel downriver, all the way to Polis. You would be singing the entire time, and I would swat your shoulder and beg you to stop, even just for a moment. I’d never win, of course. The woodland creatures loved your singing. Sometimes I wonder if you were a siren in your past life. I wonder what you are now. Perhaps a faun. That would suit your personality. Sometimes I wonder if I should have been a dwarf. They’re supposed to be excellent crafters, and I think that fits me better than a woodland elf, where I’m supposed to be light and airy and peaceful. Echo makes a better elf than I do. At least she’s light on her feet, although the peaceful part might not be quite there. Meanwhile, I have that iron cage on my leg, and I hate it.

Maybe the gods will grant my Solstice wish this year and free my leg from its cage.

You’ll be happy to know we’ll be travelling by boat this year – it was Echo’s idea. It’ll be faster, and easier on me, of course. Echo is good for that. She always thinks of things that I would never consider. Sometimes I wish she had joined our little family earlier, so you could have had more time with her. Oh well. I know you’re watching over us, and I know you two would have loved each other.

I’ve just about finished packing. The Solstice Festival is my favourite time of the year, so it wasn’t too hard to get motivated. In any case… I thought I’d keep track of the journey in these little letters to you. No one else has to see them, right?

Love you always,

Your sister, Raven

Dear Harper,

The river looks so different when you’re actually in the middle of it. Echo and I left early this morning, and we’ve been travelling down the river for most of the day. Thankfully, Echo handles the boat… I think I prefer land, honestly. My leg might bother me more, but at least the ground is solid under me. I’ve been feeling sick almost all day, with all the rocking about.

Something happened today, though. The sun was just reaching the treetops and I was standing at the railing, watching the forest pass us by when, I kid you not, a head popped out of the water.

Remember two years ago, when we met all of those mermaids at the Summer Solstice? I didn’t think I’d see one again, since they’re usually so reclusive, but apparently I was wrong. A mermaid, Harper. I didn’t think they travelled inland, but there was one on the river. Echo didn’t see her at first, but she called out to me. She was injured and had separated from her clan. Even though she only had to let the current carry her, swimming was starting to get hard for her, so I helped her up onto the boat.

Her tail was blue and iridescent, and her hair, once it dried, was thick and wavy. I didn’t know if she would need water, but she assured me she would be fine as long as she went in the water at least once a day. I’ve never seen a mermaid out of water, but when she was fully dry, her tail transformed into a pair of legs.

Her name is Luna. I should mention that.

Echo realized what was going on by that time and came to meet her. I’m lucky she loves me so much and didn’t mind when I asked if Luna could join us. After all, Luna is going to the Solstice Festival as well, and we might as well have someone else to talk to. Not that I don’t enjoy talking to Echo. I love talking to her, you know that. I just am looking forward to having someone else here. It’ll remind me of what it was like before.

You want to know what else was strange, meeting Luna? I don’t feel so sick anymore.

In any case, it’s finally time to stop for the night. We’re tying the boat up and camping on the riverbank; that’s something I pushed for when we made our travel plans. It’s easier that way. The only problem is that we only have two bedrolls, and now Luna is here with us. I thought to offer her my bedroll, and then I could sleep with Echo, but I think I’ll wait and see what she does when we tie up the boat.

Well, Echo needs me now.

Love, Raven

Dear Harper,

I have never felt so awkward in my life. Last night, I offered Luna my bedroll, but she turned it down and said she would sleep in the shallows of the river instead. And like an idiot, I asked if we needed to do anything to make sure she doesn’t drift away in the current.

Even Echo stared at me, but Luna only laughed and shrugged. I’m just glad she didn’t seem to be offended too much, but it was definitely not one of my finer moments.

In any case, we woke up this morning and lo and behold, Luna was still there. From there, it didn’t take us too long to pack up and get back on the river. Today we’re going to pass by the pixie village, actually. We don’t know if Murphy and Emori left yet, or if we’ll see them. It would be nice to travel together, though.

Thankfully, Luna doesn’t seem mad at me at all. In fact, we chatted most of the morning. She’s a healer for her clan, and she hates people fighting.

You would have loved her.

She asked me about myself, and I didn’t really know what to tell her. It was once again an incredibly awkward moment. It’s strange. I don’t tend to be awkward, but around Luna, I feel like I need to impress her, and that just makes me lose my nerves. In the end, I settled for telling her about living with Echo and running the shop. On the plus side, she didn’t seem to mind that I was a key strategist in the elf-goblin war a few years back.

I asked her how she got injured, and she told me it was a pike. They can be deadly to a mermaid, she said, and she’s lucky she got out alive. It’s difficult for her to swim, so she’s glad she found us and has our boat to keep her safe.

Echo just came to the back of the boat where I sit to write these letters and told me we should be reaching the pixie village soon, so I’m going to have to end this letter now. I’ll be back tomorrow, though, with a new one.

All my love, Raven

Dear Harper,

It’s nearly nightfall on our fourth day of travel. I would have started this sooner, but let me tell you, it’s been a strange day.

I left off yesterday just as we reached the pixie village. Murphy and Emori hadn’t left yet, and they liked the idea of travelling by boat, so now we’re a group of five. Echo doesn’t mind; she gets along well with the two of them just fine. I, on the other hand… Emori is fine. We share a lot of the same interests, and we think the same. With Murphy, though, everything is a competition. It was worse before I hurt my leg, but now I have to deal with him feeling guilty for hurting me in the first place. I bear with him for Emori’s sake, though. 

Thankfully, Luna didn’t mind that they joined us. Now we’re the Boat Menagerie, Emori joked, with two elves, two pixies, and a mermaid. There’s probably another joke out there about that, somewhere.

The rest of yesterday’s leg of the trip was pretty uneventful. Emori and I talked, Luna and Echo talked, and Murphy flitted about, trying to annoy me. I swear, pixie wings seem louder every year, or maybe my ears are just getting more sensitive. It doesn’t matter, though.

Things really started to get awful when we docked for the night. Murphy and Emori went up into a tree together, and Echo and I got our bedrolls ready. It was a quiet night, but maybe that was my mistake, thinking that.

Have I ever told you how much I hate humans? A group of them, led by a man with a beard came upon us. They probably would have left us alone, but one of them saw Luna in the shallows. Apparently, mermaid scales are valuable to humans. Who knew? I certainly didn’t. Echo realized what they were doing first and shouted to warn Luna, then Murphy and Emori must have possessed the horses and caused enough chaos that Luna was able to slip away in the darkness. Echo can be fierce when she needs to be, and she managed to scare the humans off after that.

We didn’t see Luna all night, though. You know when you meet someone, and you’ve only known them for a couple of days but it’s already enough time to miss them? That’s how I felt last night. I missed her. I missed talking to her, listening to her stories about her clan. I even tried to listen for her, but I couldn’t hear her. She must have swam far away. It was hard to fall asleep last night.

She wasn’t back in the morning, either. Echo said we were just following the river, so it should be easy for Luna to track us down, but I was worried about her. We haven’t seen her all day, and I know her tail was still bothering her. I’m worried another pike found her, or maybe she was caught by a fishing net. We’ve passed a few fishing boats on the river over the past couple of days. It’s just so strange.

Now we’ve docked again for the night. Murphy and Emori are back in a tree, and Echo set her bedroll a lot closer to mine than normal. I think she knows how worried I am.

Although I don’t think I’ll sleep well, I might as well try.

Love, Raven

Dear Harper,

I have good news! When we woke up this morning, Luna was resting in the shallows, curled up around some watercress with her tail resting on a rock. I think I almost cried in relief when I saw her. Apparently, she doubled back upriver before following after us, but with her injured tail, she could only go so fast. She only just caught up to us early this morning, and so she settled in for a rest.

Of course, when we all loaded onto the boat, she curled up on the deck and rested some more. I don’t blame her. It must have been awful, trying to follow us. Around midday, she woke up and I started to talk with her. She told me she might start sleeping on dry land so any passing humans don’t see her tail. I think that’s a good idea, and I told her that.

It was strange. She smiled at me when I said that, and my heart skipped a beat. And I know it’s not because Mother Abby said I have a weak heart. I’m trying not to think about it, though, and I’ve definitely been trying not to think about how we still only have two bedrolls.

Instead, I’ve been thinking about how the Solstice is less than ten days away, now. The Solstice Festival is something I’ve been looking forward to all year, and now it’s nearly here! Emori was out flying among the trees earlier today and she gathered enough pieces of evergreens for us to build a wreath for the boat. Echo suggested we scatter seeds at our campsite tonight, and I agreed. It’s nice to get us into the Yuletide spirit leading up to the Festival. Maybe we’ll even convince Murphy to meditate with us tonight.

We’re nearly to our docking point for today, though, and I’m starting to feel anxious about the night again. I think I need to talk to Echo… or maybe Emori. Yes, Emori might be better for this. Echo is too close to me.

Sorry this is so short, but I don’t have much time.

Love, Raven

Dear Harper,

Well, it’s the morning after the first night of Luna sleeping on dry land. In the end, Echo gave up her bedroll and slept with me. I would have offered, but I was too busy shouting at Murphy because he was being an ass. Sorry, I know you hate when I use words like that. He was being his normal self, and I was over it. So I shouted at him and scared a deer in the woods. Some elf, right?

I actually had a nice sleep, tucked in with Echo. We haven’t slept in the same bedroll in a while, actually, and I had forgotten how nice it was to sleep with her. I think Luna was still awake when I fell asleep, though. She didn’t say anything this morning, but I could tell she was restless, especially when she went for a swim while we were packing up. It is really something, watching a mermaid swim. Different from watching a fish. Her hair billows around her, and you can really tell how much she loves being in the water.

We’re all in the boat, now. Emori is keeping Murphy occupied for my sake, and I’m truly grateful. Echo is at the rudder, as usual, and Luna is sitting next to me while I write. It’s the first time she’s been so close to me while I write and, if I’m being honest, it’s a bit unnerving. She could very easily look over my shoulder and see what I’m writing, and since it’s about her, I’m sure she’d have a lot of questions.

Maybe I should stop writing about her. The trees are thinning out, right now. I think we’re about to pass through a clearing. It’s the type of spot you would have loved. You’d be up on the prow, singing and the animals would flock to the sound of your voice. It would be amazing. Echo would be tapping along on the railing, and I’d be sitting beside you, listening to you sing. Murphy and Emori would be flying above us, creating showers of pixie dust, and Luna… Luna would dive into the water and break the surface, throwing her hair back in an arc. Maybe she would sing, too. She hasn’t sang yet, but if I know anything about mermaids, it’s that they sing.

She’s humming beside me. Crap. Maybe she read what I was writing.

I’m just going to end this now and put the journal away before she sees any more.

Love, Raven

Dear Harper,

I am ridiculously out of it this morning. Last night, when we reached the campsite, Luna suggested we give Echo her own bedroll, since she gave hers up the night before.

Which meant Luna was sleeping with me.

Beside me.

Facing me.

I could barely breathe. I certainly couldn’t sleep. Not with Luna’s face inches from my own.

I think I might fancy her, and that terrifies me.

Echo keeps staring at me because I keep yawning. I think she might tell me to take a nap, but I really don’t want Luna to figure out that I was awake all night.

What do I do?

I need to hide my journal so no one sees this. Thankfully I know even if you were here, you wouldn’t tell anyone. You were always good at keeping secrets.

Love, Raven

Dear Harper,

I survived yesterday, somehow. Surprisingly, it was easy to hide my panic from everyone, especially Luna. I just had to pretend to be interested in the trees once we passed through the clearing. Very interested in trees. Let me tell you, it was stupidly boring. Last night, though, I had the bedroll to myself, and was able to sleep soundly through the night, and today we’re back on the river. Six more days and we’ll be at Polis, ready for the Solstice Festival.

It snowed, today. I’ve never been more glad that it’s not cold enough for the river to freeze, but the snow falling made it that much more magical. Murphy and Emori spread pixie dust over the boat, mixing with the snow, and it was just… beautiful. Luna sat by the railing, trailing her fingers in the water, and I had to stop myself from staring at her.

I never thought I’d say this, but I am so grateful to Murphy (and Emori, of course). He was an excellent distraction today.

It’s time to camp again, and Echo noticed we were low on food, so she decided to go foraging. I offered to go with her, but she refused. I think she wanted to get some time by herself, and I completely understand, but it just meant I was sitting at the campsite alone with Luna for a couple of hours.

She asked me about the journal today, and I told her about you. I told her I was writing down everything I saw, as if I was talking directly to you, which honestly is kind of the truth. The only part I left out was the number of times I’ve written about her. She wanted to know more about you, and it was so easy to tell her everything. About how you had the sweetest soul, but the fiercest spirit. About how anyone who knew you was instantly drawn to you. How you made everyone’s lives better just for having known you.

Murphy can never know I cried a little, talking about you. Never.

Luna was a good listener, though. She said she wished she could have known you, and I told her you would have liked her. You would have liked her easygoing nature and her love of nature, and she would have loved how you hated violence, yet would protect your loved ones in a heartbeat.

Well, I didn’t exactly say that, but you understand me.

When Echo returned, we ate the berries and roots she found in the forest. She even managed to find my favourite root, and it turns out Luna likes it too.

Go figure.

Tonight I’m sleeping with Echo again, since apparently we’re on a rotating schedule with the bedrolls. That means I have to survive two more nights sharing a bedroll with Luna.

I don’t know if I can do it.

Please send me the strength.

Love, Raven

Dear Harper,

I couldn’t find my journal all day. I was so worried that Luna had found it, and then, you will never guess where it was.

Murphy, the little shit. He had it.

He’s going to be insufferable for the rest of the trip. I’m sorry, Harper. I hate him. I really do.

Emori finally convinced him to give it back to me. She took him up to the trees to talk to him, and I’ve never appreciated her more. I’ll have to hide it better from now on, and I really hope Murphy listens to his wife. Otherwise, I don’t know what I’ll do.

Tonight, Echo has the solo bedroll, which means I have to share with Luna. It’s going to be a long night.

Wish me luck.

Love, Raven

Dear Harper,

It is only the small hours of the morning, and I have slipped away from the bedroll and Luna’s arms. Yes, you read that right. Somehow, I dozed off, but when I woke, Luna’s arm was around me and my back was to her.

I have never felt so hot in my life, and I’m sure my face has never been more red.

It was hard, but I was able to slip out from under her arm and crawl away. I didn’t know what else to do except write to you. I don’t know how much longer I can do this. Luna is so warm, and kind, and beautiful, and I’m held back by the stupid iron cage on my leg. I can’t imagine she would ever feel about me the same way I feel about her.

Because the sad truth is, I think I’m falling in love with her. She has this joy about her, whenever she slips into the water for a swim and her tail appears. There’s also a wisdom to her, though, and it’s a different kind of wisdom from Echo. Echo’s wisdom is in the practical nature of things, but with Luna, it’s in how she sees the world for all of its beauty. I know she has been through shit in the past, but it hasn’t stopped her from embracing life in the present.

I think I need to go foraging, since I just realized what I need to give her as a gift at the Festival.

Love, Raven

Dear Harper,

We will arrive at Polis in two days, and not a moment too soon. Yesterday morning, after I found a gift for Luna, I slid back into the bedroll next to her. Our day on the river was wildly uneventful, and last night I slept alone. It was a nice moment to clear my head.

Echo has noticed that I am on edge, and she finally asked me what was wrong. I hate to admit it, but I couldn’t tell her. How could I? It’s been Echo and I for almost a year, and admitting that I have feelings for Luna could make Echo think I don’t love her. I do love her, though. I love Echo more than I can express, but it’s the same way I love you, and Emori. She’s my family, my home. But Luna, she feels different. With Luna, I feel like I’m breathing fresh air, untainted by humans. It’s exhilarating, but at the same time, terrifying. I’ve never felt this way about another being before.

It snowed again, today, and Echo thinks the river might freeze before we return home, so we might have to journey on foot. Now, we’re camping for the night and I’m sharing with Echo again. She’ll probably want to talk to me again, and I don’t know what I’ll say to her.

Maybe I should tell her the truth. I’ll try to do that.

Love, Raven

Dear Harper,

This is our last day on the river. Tonight, we’ll camp outside Polis, and tomorrow the Festival begins.

There, I’ve covered the boring, mundane things. Now, I need to talk about last night. I told Echo the truth about how I’ve been feeling, and I am so sorry I ever doubted her. She was so happy for me; she hugged me and kissed my forehead. Of course, I had to remind her that nothing has happened, and that I don’t even know if Luna feels the same way I do.

Echo told me to stop being silly. Apparently, we aren’t the only ones who have whispered conversations at night. I don’t know what to do with this information.

I definitely didn’t know what to do when we all got on the boat this morning and Luna’s tail changed into legs and she stepped up beside me at the prow and took my hand in hers. She told me I looked beautiful this morning in the flower crown Emori made for me, and I didn’t know what to say so I only hummed. I hummed. I didn’t say anything to her.

Her tail is stronger now, so she swam alongside the boat for a while in the early afternoon. The iridescent sparkle of her scales kept catching my eye, and I had to turn to my journal to distract myself.

That’s where I’m at, now. Luna is swimming, Murphy and Emori are talking about the Festival, Echo is steering the boat, and I’m writing in my journal.

Tonight is going to be a challenge. Sleeping next to Luna has been increasingly difficult, and now that everyone knows my secret…

I don’t know why I keep trying to hide it in here. Maybe it’s because I feel safe telling you?

Please send me strength,

Love, Raven

Dear Harper,

Well, today is the day. The boat is tied, our bags are packed, and we are going to be walking the rest of the way to Polis. Luna woke before me this morning and swam up and down the river, making sure she would be fine during the walk.

Somehow, I managed to sleep last night, even next to her. It was strangely comforting, feeling her chest rise and fall, listening to her breathing. I didn’t even mind when she slipped her arm around me again. Maybe it’s what Echo told me. Maybe Luna is secretly feeling the same things I’m feeling. Maybe I should tell her how I feel, so we can stop pretending.

I don’t know why we haven’t said anything to each other yet.

My gift to her is safe in my bag, along with my other gifts. I genuinely hope she’ll like it. It holds such a deep meaning, and I want her to know it.

Echo just asked if everyone is ready to go, so I guess my next letter will come after the lighting of the Yule Log tonight.

Love, Raven

Dear Harper,

We reached Polis, the Yule Log was lit, we set our altar in our cabin, and Murphy was a royal ass.

I really shouldn’t have expected anything different from him, but I thought he would respect the sacred traditions of the Solstice Festival. Instead, he took it upon himself to ask Luna and I very loudly when we were going to admit we had feelings for each other.

When I say I lost it, it is not an understatement. I don’t remember much of what happened, but I do remember screaming at him. The next thing I remember is being wrapped in Luna’s arms while she whispered in my ear and hummed a melody I haven’t heard before. Emori dragged Murphy out of the cabin, and Echo went with them.

That left Luna and I alone in the cabin.

She asked me if I was alright, and I genuinely didn’t have an answer for her. I was still crying, and she pulled me into her arms again. Her hair was still damp from her swim in the lake next to Polis. I remember that, as well as her fingers sliding through my own hair. I remember her telling me it was alright, that I didn’t have to worry. I also remember her kissing me.

It’s been so long since I was last kissed, but kissing Luna was like kissing someone for the first time. Her lips were soft and she was so gentle…

I genuinely think I’m in love.

After the kiss, neither of us said anything. We just sat together, with me in her arms. I don’t remember the others coming back, but they must have at some point.

Harper, I need your strength now, more than ever, because if I don’t tell Luna I love her before the Solstice tomorrow, I don’t know if I ever will.

All my love, Raven

Dear Harper,

Today was the Solstice. Echo and I exchanged our gifts early in the day, and Emori and I did the same shortly afterwards. Murphy avoided me most of the morning, but eventually he came to me and gave me a small wreath he had made, and I gave him blue agate. Hopefully he knows that I forgive him for everything he’s done.

Luna found members of her clan and spent the morning with them, but she soon returned to us. When I finally had a moment alone with her, I gave her the gift I chose for her – lapis lazuli and purple irises, for her wisdom.

No one has ever looked at me the way Luna did then.

She gave me my gift, too. Red jasper. Resilience. I didn’t care who saw in that moment, I kissed her. And then, after the kiss, I said it. I needed her to know it. I told her I loved her.

My weak heart was pounding in my throat while I waited for her to say something. I think my whole body was trembling, actually. And then she said she loved me too. If my heart could explode with happiness, it did in that moment.

There’s a mermaid tradition, she told me, of new couples swimming together on the Solstice. It’s supposed to bring good luck in the coming year. She asked me if I would want to swim with her, and I said yes. The iron on my leg had to come off, and I was glad for it. Luna took me to the lake and slid in, and I watched her legs turn into a tail. Then I slipped in after her and she took my hands, guiding me out into the lake. The water had a chill to it, but I didn’t care, since Luna was there with me.

It’s funny, how two weeks ago, I didn’t know Luna existed, and now I’ve completed a mermaid ritual of love and commitment with her. You would be so proud of me, Harper.

The cabin has three beds, but Murphy and Emori sleep in the rafters. I think one of the beds will go unused tonight, though.

It’s nearly time for the Festival to begin, so I will return to my journal later, if I have time. Until then, know that I would not have survived the past two weeks without your strength and guidance. I’ve felt you with me the entire time, and I know you’re here somewhere. Perhaps I’ll find you during the Festival. Until then, take care.

Love, Raven


End file.
